Michael Newman

Adam Sandler

Donna Newman

Kate Beckinsale

Morty

Christopher Walken

Ted Newman

Henry Winkler

Ammer

David Hasselhoff

Bill Rando

Sean Astin

Trudy Newman

Julie Kavner

Bed, Bath & Beyond Guy

Nick Swardson

Janine

Jennifer Coolidge

Alice

Rachel Dratch

Newman Employee

Billy Slaughter

Ben Newman at 17 years old

Jonah Hill

Ben Newman at 7 years old

Joseph Castanon

Samantha Newman at 5 years old

Tatum McCann

Stacy

Sophie Monk

Kevin O'Doyle

Cameron Monaghan

Ben Newman at 22-30 years old

Jake Hoffman

Samantha Newman at 14 years old

Lorraine Nicholson

Samantha's Friend

Cheyenne Alexis Dean

Ignatius

Nate Torrence

Kirsten

Katheryn Cain

Janine

Jennifer Coolidge*

Samantha Newman at 27 years old

Katie Cassidy

Susie

Theresa Barrera

Judy

Jenae Altschwager

Dr. Bergman

Sidney Ganis

Sparkling Water Guy

Erik Audé

Linda

Michelle Lombardo

Julie Newman

Jana Kramer

Lakeside Camp Girl

Lily Mo Sheen

Lakeside Camp Boy

Willy Goldstein

Kathy O'Doyle

Carolyn Hennesy

Doctor Bergman

Sid Ganis

Watsuhita Head Executive

Michael Yama

Prince Habeeboo

Rob Schneider

Watsuhita Executive

Mio Takada

Watsuhita Executive

Eiji Inoue

Watsuhita Executive

Toshi Toda

Ancient Executive

George K. Eguchi

Singer

Dolores O'Riordan

Aunt Peggy

Sally Insul

Jogger

Iryna Blokhina

Male Nurse

Frank Coraci

Singing Driver (uncredited)

Terry Crews

Doctor

Tim Herlihy

Firecracker Teen

Brianna Davis

Hot Assistant (uncredited)

Elizabeth DeCicco

Office Worker (uncredited)

Tracy Britton

Michael at 10 Years Old

Emilio Cast

Hot Employee (uncredited)

Abra Chouinard

Ping Woo's Grandfather (uncredited)

Howard Fong

Samantha's Friend

Elena Patten

Narrator of Michael's Past (uncredited)

James Earl Jones

Ping Woo

Elliott Cho

Punk Chick (uncredited)

Celeste Thorson

Ping Woo's Father

Alan Au

Wedding Guest (uncredited)

Lana Titov

Firecracker Teen

Ryan Keiser

Ammer in SAP scene (uncredited)

Jorge Garcia

Firecracker Teen

Christopher Levy

Best Man (uncredited)

Jason Sandler

Firecracker Teen

Nickole Reyes

Firecracker Teen

Rob Jones

Habeeboo Entourage

Manish Goyal

Habeeboo Entourage

Marco Khan

Habeeboo Entourage

Ahmad Jordan

Habeeboo Entourage

Nick Hodaly

Habeeboo Entourage

Alireza Tanbakoochi

Band Leader

John Pagano

Firecracker Teen

Brianne Davis

Firecracker Teen

Robert Jones

Director

Frank Coraci